Death Behind Intentions
by Akai Naiya
Summary: Matt is killed while Mello finds out that he has to forget about him, but what happens when he finds out that maybe Matt's death wasn't a good thing after all?
1. Hell is good enough

**Disclaimer: I do not own Death Note as much as I wished I did. AN: Yeah this is what happens when I get extremely bored…**

They killed him and now he was gone forever. I stood and allowed my eyes to take a glimpse of his lifeless corpse…

"I swear Matt, your death will not be in vain…" I kneeled down and used the sleeve of my hooded jacket to wipe the blood off his face that stained it in such a way as though it were a permanent part.

A smile graced my lips as I stood and stared at his corpse. Lying there in his own coppery puddle of blood, he resembled something else in my mind now; almost something weak that did not deserve to live. I left his corpse on the ground where it had laid. He didn't matter to me anymore. Being dead he had no more uses and heartless it may seem that was how things were.

Turning I walked away from the dead body that in a few days would decay and forever be joined from hence it came, but his soul. Where would it go?

"Hmf, probably Heaven knowing him." I grunted to myself pulling the hood to my jacket over my head.

From now on, I had to forget about Matt and focus on my true purpose for being in existence. To beat Near. That was all that mattered to me now and I'd be damned if I didn't accomplish my life's sole purpose for being. Even if it meant my death, I'd kill Kira and beat Near and God knows I don't need Matt to kill.

Smiling I walked through the debris…

_Maybe, just maybe, Hell is fitting for a person like me…_

**I want to add onto it, but I'm not so sure if I will. I hope to though…**


	2. Let Downs

I walked around my apartment trying to figure out my next move. How in the Hell was I going to catch Kira?

I sat down at the kitchen table and looked through all the intelligence that Matt had managed to scour up prior to his death.

"None of this adds up!" I banged my fist against the kitchen table angrily cursing under my breath as I did so.

"_Maybe it's because you're reading it wrong Mels." _

I jumped out of my chair alarmed with the statement. Turning my eyes scanned the surrounding area for the person who had just said that, but came up short. However, for some bizarre reason I was almost sure that it was Matt's voice that I had just heard. I shook my head confoundedly and decided to sit back down and forget about it with a sigh.

Perhaps I was just hearing things which in all honesty would not come to my surprise considering I'm not used to being alone, but what did it matter anymore…

"I don't understand it, Misa Amane was suspected as being the subsequent Kira and then abruptly all suspicions were immediately dropped. Prior to L's death Near had also informed me that it were possible that Kira was in the midst of the Japanese Task Force and after that it seemed as if Kira's power was transferred yet again." Picking up a composition notebook, I flipped slowly through the pages of notes that Matt had suitably taken in every meeting we had with the white haired albino, but even then, nothing really seemed to add up. It was of no importance now because I had never desired to have Near's assistance. I could contrive Kira's whereabouts by myself without the help of Matt or Near. I didn't need nor did I want their help it, was that simple.

"Damn it!" I threw the black checkered composition notebook across the room and closing my eyes I leaned back in my seat. This had turned out to be harder than I thought it would be. It just about forced the thought upon me that things would prove to be easier if I had only had Matt, but no way was I about to break a resolve as solid as mine over something so insignificant. I didn't need him or anyone else or at least that was what I had been telling myself this entire time. Still it wouldn't be all that-No I refuse to think such things! I. Do not. Need. Him.

"_Calm down and think Mels." _

There it was again! That awkwardly familiar voice. I shot my eyes open violently and looked around the small apartment room.

"_Mels, think…"_

It was as if he was standing in the room with me…he could've even been standing behind me, but fuck no one else was in here besides me.

"Matt? Tell me where you are!" I looked from my right then to my left, my eyes searching eagerly for the redhead.

"_Mels…But you don't want me here…you hated me…"_

So, maybe Matt may not have really been dead at least not in spirit, but where? Where was he?

_Crash! _

"_Mels?" _

"Matt…" I ran into our bedroom and quickly jumped back. I wasn't for sure if at the time I shuddered, but if I didn't I sure, as fuck should've. "MATT!"

_Why'd he…_


	3. The Paranormal

**My laptop broke for so now I am making work what I have. Hopefully it will be fixed soon. Sorry for not posting lately and hope this makes up for it.**

Before I did not believe in anything that had to do with the paranormal and in fact I had lost all belief in it. However all that I knew and believed I began to have doubt in.

Last week I nearly had a heart attack at the sight that laid there in the floor before me. Matt's dead body was strung out all over the room in dismembered parts. Not the way I had remembered leaving it in. Perhaps I thought to myself this was his way at telling me something. What it was he was trying to tell me was far from my train of thought.

I stood in front of the doorway nervous. What was I supposed to do with a dead body? Much less a dismembered one. There was not much I could do. By now everything was run by Kira and what wasn't run by Kira was far too dangerous for me to attempt. I would just get rid of his body and think no more on it. Matt was dead and that was all I needed to be assured of at that moment to know that it was the right thing to do.

That night after I had finished disposing of the body in a vacant lot decided to rest. I had been getting nowhere with the Kira case and to be frankly honest I had to admit that with Matt around I had been doing better. Though that night I had been extremely bothered by something something that could not be explained in words. Knocking sounds I recall. A constant knocking that had not stopped since the first time I had been woken up by it.

I shook my head idly that night lying back down. I was just over stressed I told myself. It had to be it. There was absolutely nothing else that could have explained it. Nothing.

I wanted to believe that it was guilt as nights went on, the room growing colder, the electricity going out simultaneously, and I becoming sicker. Each passing day became worse. I wanted to believe in so much at that point, but was forced not to. It was different now. However I refused to believe that _he_ was still alive. Spirit or not I refused it.

Perhaps that was the kind of thing that happened when people desert someone whom they love without truly knowing it.

**I know that it is a short chapter and I wish I could have written more, but I would be very pleased if suggestions were made as to how I could improve it or just any ideas. :)**** Thankie! XD**


	4. Recollection

**AN: I decided to finish this one even though it's been a while. Yea, I know I'm lame.**

I didn't mean to desert him. Somewhere in my mind after seeing him dead I wanted to pretend it never happened. Perhaps it was the fact that If I didn't leave him like that then I would have lost. It would have meant that I allowed my emotions to get the better of me and right now I couldn't take that. I could have no distractions. The Kira case was the top task and I could not allow anyone no matter who they were to distract me.

Putting my pen down I reopened the composition notebook. I had to try this again. Only this time no matter what I heard or happened I would ignore it. About five minutes into reading I began to hear it again the knocking, but not only that a loud high pitched almost frequency type noise. There was no way in hell I could just dismiss this and try to continue on without noticing. Getting up out of my chair I took the composition notebook and my jacket. I couldn't stay here anymore. There had to be somewhere else. Again I was abandoning him.


End file.
